is two guys collaborating to write on writing and collaboration.

Friday
Jan 27, 2006

Round 1.6 [Liber XII v. Rasputin the Translator] posted by Martin

Rasputin
I’m all for finding the way into the story through our bearded man, but it should be said up front that we have very different ideas of what he’s like. I see him more as a deliberate man taking advantage of a political situation, and in so doing making Machiavellian plays at power (which, is why I named him Rasputin to begin with, the bearded look that Roky rocks was just a second convenient parallel—for more reading: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rasputin, although the mis-(dis, whatever) information on this page is more like the pop-culture image of the man I raise: http://www.disinfo.com/archive/pages/dossier/id291/pg1/). I also think the pseudo-religious vibe is important with him. Basically, I see him as a 21st century Rasputin in many, many ways.

One option for him, in my view, might be that he’s not actually the one with the power, but he’s fronting. Maybe he’s holding somebody hostage who is the one with the power. In this view (and incorporating some of your ideas): Aliens land > Misunderstanding, bad things happen > tensions rise > Raspy appears out of nowhere and things get calm > Negotiations are tense > Raspy demands mucho somethingo > nation’s conservatives dig their heels in > Nation’s liberals want to give him everything > Raspy over plays his hand > smart agent finds that Raspy is a charlatan covering for a truly talented young person > Rescues young person in daring event > Raspy falters, having lost his powers > truly talented young person wins the day for the good guys.

I don’t see him as evil, per se, but I see him as taking advantage of a situation to his own benefit, and possibly screwing quite a few people in the process. Well, I guess some would call that evil.

I think your plot with a Clarice-like agent tracking him is very clearly laid out and direct, but it’s not hitting my excitement nerve for some reason. I know what it is: I want Raspy to take an active role in his accomplishments. So, I can’t see him being a reluctant hero-cum-villian, but being a manipulator from day one. Is he evil and doing this really for his own good, or is there some deeper truth? That solution could lead to a: Raspy is asking for something evil > People refuse to give in > one plucky agent realizes great truth > politicians, on her evidence, give in > It turns out Raspy was bluffing and really is an okay guy! Everyone is safe!

So, all of this is to say: yes. I think the key to this story is the Rasputin character, and finding the character that gets us both jazzed about him.

Liber XII
Maybe this should be Liber Ver XII.0—which reminds me, what happened to versions I-XI? I hope the fucking computer didn’t do them in too….

The problem with the Die Hard example is that the reason we could so easily get caught up in the action point of Hans Gruber taking over the Nakatomi building is because his motivation is so simple that it needs no explanation: money. It is genius that money was the case, because if it was politics he would have had to explain somehow what they were (Lefty? Righty? Foreign? American? Goals? Point of violence?).

So, since computers aren’t motivated by money, we still have to somehow—even if it is a throwaway—answer the question of why the computer went bad. I mean, maybe it’s as simple as somebody tripped on a cord, or spilled coffee on the motherboard (how big would the motherboard be on a planet-sized computer?), or maybe it’s as complex as the matrix-o-thon looping realities, etc. etc.

In any case, it’s not a big deal—we can come up with something—but we should be prepared to answer that question if we pick Liber XII to work on.

I like your monk idea, but what about instead of him stepping up when everybody dies, I think he should come to realize that something is wrong, and he knows how to fix it. Nobody will listen to him despite his protestations and because they listen to the elder supposedly-wise monks, many people die. Our boy leads a small band of rag-tag outsider monks (some comical, some weak, some geeky, some freaky) to take on the computer, which pisses off the establishment monks, and they boot the rag-taggers out of the safe hiding place. But, the rag-tag group triumphs saving everybody, and the establishment issues an edict that they were wrong four hundred years after the young monk dies. Oh wait, we should speed that up for the movies—make it 100 years.

Comments (0) — Category: the screenplay

HIDE Down Arrow

What is Spitball!?

Spitball! is two guys collaborating to write about writing and collaboration. We're writing partners who have worked together since 2000, and placed in the top 100 in the last Project Greenlight for our script YELLOW.

Currently, we are both working on multiple screenplay, short story, and novel ideas independently and together, and collaborate on this blog.

What Spitball! used to be

Spitball! started as an attempt to collaborate on a screenplay online in real time. From January 2006 to July 2007 we worked on an interactive process to decide the story we were going to make. A full postmortem is coming, but you can find the find all the posts by looking in the category Original Version.

During this period, we affected the personalities of two of the most famous spitball pitchers from the early 20th Century. Look at our brief bios for more info about this, and so as not to be confused as to who is talking when.

We rebooted the franchise in early 2009 in its current form.


 Subscribe to our feed


Our Twitter account, where we note when longer articles are posted. While we're at it, here's Kent and Martin's Twitter accounts.

Kent M. Beeson

Urban Shockah pic

Kent M. Beeson (aka Urban Shockah) is a stay-at-home dad and stay-at-home writer, living in Seattle, WA with his wife, 2 year old daughter and an insane cat. In 2007, he was a contributor to the film blog ScreenGrab, where he presciently suggested Jackie Earle Haley to play Rorschach in the Watchmen movie, and in 2008, he wrote a film column for the comic-book site ComiXology called The Watchman. (He's a big fan of the book, if you couldn't tell.) In 2009, he gave up the thrill of freelance writing to focus on screenplays and novels, although he sometimes posts to his blog This Can't End Well, which a continuation of his first blog, he loved him some movies. He's a Pisces, and his favorite movie of all time is Jaws. Coincidence? I think not.

Martin McClellan

Burleigh Grimes pic

Martin (aka Burley Grymz) is a designer and writer. He occasionally blogs at his beloved Hellbox, and keeps a longer ostensibly more interesting bio over here at his eponymous website. You can also find him on Twitter.